Self-Sabotage is any thought, behavior, choice, action or decision that you make that gets in the way of achieving or accomplishing what you set out to do.

Self-Sabotage can come into your life at any time and in any way. You won’t even know you’re doing it because it comes in disguised; such as old beliefs or even habits, things you do without really giving them any thought. It can be hard to see and just plain tricky. Not to mention coming all at the wrong time. You can be headed down a path and not even see it until it’s too late, and before you know it you’re off track and your results are just not what you wanted at all.

The first step is to become aware of what is at work in your mind and in your lives. Awareness is the key to any change. Seriously, Self-Sabotage is not only about work and business it can show up in any area of your life, including your relationships, your finances and your health. Making it all the more important to do something about it. So if you want to make changes in your life or do something different or jump to that next level, then you’ll want to pay attention here, because Self-Sabotage will come up. More often than you realize.

What are some of the ways Sabotage comes into your life?

One form of Self-Sabotage you may not be aware of is feeling like you have to do everything yourself. The old adage ‘it’s easier to just do it myself than teach someone to help me’ is really a way of stopping yourself because you have no way of getting to the pieces you really should be doing. For instance, if you do the work your assistant or VA should be doing, you miss opportunities for growth and sales.

Another form of Self-Sabotage is the belief that everyone else’s needs, wants and desires are more important than yours. Think about this, every time something comes up, say for your kids or your boss, do you drop whatever you are doing to take care of their stuff. You may think you need to be this way, but in fact this is one area you get in our own way. You can put things in place to combat this and you can come to an agreement with others in your life to do both.

A third form of Self-Sabotage is attracting and giving in to distractions. Something comes up and you give in to it and attend to it. For instance, you’re in the middle of a project and you remember the laundry and you go take care of it. Technology is a big part of this one. The email, text, Facebook post, tweet that comes in, you just can’t put it out of your mind and have to check it right then. There is a sense of immediate gratification as well as an unwritten rule that you have to respond right away. These distractions are interruptions that break your focus and are a huge time leak in your schedule.

Here’s another one, listening to your inner critic. That voice inside your head telling you that you can’t do it, or that you don’t know enough or that you’re headed in the wrong direction. This voice rears its ugly head at the most inopportune times, especially when you’re trying to make a big leap, and it gets your attention.

Perfectionism is another form of Self-Sabotage. The belief or feeling that something has to be perfect before it can be acted on or implemented runs the risk of keeping us stuck right where you are. It can be anything, writing that book you’ve always wanted, or term paper or business proposal. We want perfection, the perfect job, the perfect spouse, the perfect house; it all keeps us stuck in the pursuit.

Focusing primarily on sales and money so that you can avoid taking care of feelings, change and/or taking responsibility. This is probably the most subtle one, and I’m listing it last here on purpose. By focusing on sales and or money , you allow yourself to not see any reason to change, or to deal with any emotions that could be coming up in you from what’s going on in your life.

Life events like divorce, parenting, death of someone close to you, even moving can prompt heavy emotions to come to the surface. If you aren’t aware and good at dealing with them, they will get suppressed and ignored. This habit can result in emotional upheaval, even illness if it is not attended to.

I recently had this experience with a client at his Luxury Transformational Experience (what used to be referred to as a Retreat). It was so prevalent that he was doing it everywhere, and still he couldn’t see it. He just couldn’t see it. Once I pointed it out, it stopped him. I had to point it out again and again, because his mind was dismissing it, until it caught his awareness.

It was a bit unsettling for him and yet made a huge difference in his experience, in the work we can do together as well as in the results he will get, now and in the future. Especially as he gets better at dealing with these emotions, and unpleasant feelings rather than ignoring them and avoiding them.

“Seeing how I am sabotaging my business because of fear about things going on in his life was pretty shocking. Now I am really glad I can see it. My business results have been shocking, puzzling and frustrating, and now I know what’s really been happening. And now I can change it.”

There are many more forms of Self-Sabotage, these are just a few. They can be different for everyone. The result though is the same, to keep you stuck and comfortable without moving forward.

We all have our own way of stopping ourselves — it’s an individual thing. There are some very common ways of Self-Sabotage, how it manifests in your life is or can be unique to you. Take some time this week to think about what your patterns of Self-Sabotage are in your life.

If you want some help with your own Self-Sabotage and finally move forward, please reach out to us here… info@worklesscreatemore.com.

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Maureen Considine is Founder and CEO of Finding Your Way Coaching. A Master Coach with expertise in Income Acceleration, Business Development, Sales and Mindset, she is the Wealth Health Creation Strategist for entrepreneurs, executives, and other high performers. Maureen has over 25 years of experience in sales and marketing. She has helped hundreds of clients grow their businesses and reach their true potential using her unique, intuitive, and holistic approach. Maureen has a B.A. in Psychology, with training in mindset and the Psychology of Sales.