Why is it easier to talk to some people than others? What is it about certain people that makes you clam up? Something in others makes it really easy to talk to them a lot and for a long time. I am sure you know the feeling.
You’re in the grocery store and you see someone you know and go about your business. Or on the other hand, you are in the grocery store, see someone you know, stop to talk and before you know it 20 minutes have gone by and you’re calling home yet again to say the shopping took longer than expected.
What about family? These same things can happen with those you are closer to, making it a much bigger obstacle to get over. The spouse who reads the paper while you’re talking or the teen who repeatedly checks their phone for texts. You’ve all been there and possibly even done these things yourselves. You are all so busy and always rushing off to the next thing that you wonder why you don’t know what those closest to you have been up to.
This is often about the connection you feel toward certain people that makes it easier to talk to them. It doesn’t always mean you see them more often, because the old saying “we pick up right where we left off,” rings true for many people. When you feel less connected to the people in your lives you often feel like opening up less.
This happens in the work environment as well. You notice you have tried to track down your boss several times, only to hear, I am in the middle of something and I will get back to you. Perhaps you are a new business owner where connecting and communicating is key to growing your business.
As a leader and visionary of your company it is critical that your colleagues and your employees feel like they can talk to you when they need to. You want them to come to you with their questions, to seek solutions, you also need opportunities to get to know them. It is up to you to set the tone and to create a culture where communication is easy and sharing is a priority.
So what do you do? There are some things you can do to improve communication and enhance your relationships with all the other people in your lives, whether they are acquaintances or much closer to you.
Our culture continues to grow and move ever faster, and we continue to have vast amounts of information readily available at our fingertips. Is it more important now to be able to talk on the fly, or do you need to go back to basics to show people you are listening? The answer is probably both.
These are all good questions. And all things you can work on. So, how can you make it easier for people to talk to you — even easier for you to talk to them?!
One Key To Making It Easier For People To Talk To You Is To:
Be Available
One of the best ways of making it easier for people to talk to you is to be available. It is important to be available, whether it’s with your spouse, your kids, your boss, your employees or the new client/business partner. You need to make time to interact, to build a relationship and to accomplish the goals you set on a personal and professional level. It is important in both places.
Another way to look at that is this, if you want something such as people to feel comfortable talking to you, it is up to you to create that ease.
Yes that means things like having an open door policy at the office, but it goes beyond that.
It means being willing to take their call, even if it comes at an inopportune moment.
It means setting up a time to talk and sticking to it.
It means being free when others have the time. For instance, teens don’t always talk very easily or for long. It is important to be ‘free’ when they are in the ‘mood.’ In business, most people are so incredibly busy that it can be a challenge to set up that sales call, unless you can be the one to make the time.
It means being around to help with the decision making. This is a little thing that can make a big difference. For example, when there is a big deadline approaching for a new client or project, along with that comes many decisions to make, that can be easier with opportunities to discuss them, or to run the presentation by you before the client.
The messages you may be sending to others can be the very thing that makes them clam up or turn to someone else to talk to. Take a look at where you might be falling short here and where some of the above ideas would be helpful.
Are you struggling with communication in your relationships or business?
Are you interested in creating a work or home life environment where good communication is at the heart of your relationships? Are you ready to truly make yourself open and available to others? In doing so, you can experience an unexpected result for yourselves and those around you–greater business enjoyment and success, deeper gratification in your relationships, and fulfillment in the personal and professional life you’ve created. You may need outside expertise and insight to get there.
Maureen Considine is Founder and CEO of Finding Your Way Coaching. A Master Coach with expertise in Income Acceleration, Business Development, Sales and Mindset, she is the Wealth Health Creation Strategist for entrepreneurs, executives, and other high performers. Maureen has over 25 years of experience in sales and marketing. She has helped hundreds of clients grow their businesses and reach their true potential using her unique, intuitive, and holistic approach. Maureen has a B.A. in Psychology, with training in mindset and the Psychology of Sales.